thoughts

Tonight once again i am feeling sentimental. I dunno why there seems to be a period of time when i'll feel down all of a sudden, and just wish tat time can turn back. Again, i'll blame this all on my hormones.

Christmas is coming real soon, and this year will be coming to an end. From other's point of view, many would think i'm very fortunate cox i need not work and all i need to do is to spend time wid my son at home. At times, I do feel bored. Thinking back of how life was before venturing into marriage, my life was packed wid works, dancing, gatherings, outings & performances. Sometimes I really do miss being able to do all the things tat i love without considering about anyone else. Things are different now. Whatever decision tat i make, it'll haf to include my hubby & son. Perhaps tis is wat it mean by growing up and becoming more matured. More responsibilities to handle and becoming more caring and 'mother'ly. Sigh!

I was trying to read back some old mails which owest bring me back previous memories.... deep and emotional. Until today I do not understand why.... do not understand myself and do not understand my heart.

Telling myself once more, I gotta be strong. All that had passed, I must let go. It will be best for everyone if we can all just forget and venture on. Another new year is coming.... what should I expect of this new year??? Will I still be treading on the same spot like wat I had done for the past 2 years??? So much more challenge to face in motherhood.... sometimes i just feel frail and need a place to rest. Crazy hormones.... i better go to bed now!